What Coaching Taught Me About Managing My Energy

For years, I treated energy as something I either had or lacked. If I woke up feeling capable, I said yes to the early interview, the afternoon meeting, the evening event and the long drive home. If I felt depleted, I assumed I needed to become more disciplined. Working with a coach gave me a different perspective: energy is a resource to understand, direct and protect.

That shift has changed how I work as a broadcaster, author, speaker and host. It has also influenced the way I talk about women’s wellbeing through This Girl Is On Fire. Managing energy is not about becoming endlessly productive. It is about recognising what restores you, what drains you and how to make choices that support the person you want to be.

Energy Is More Than Physical Stamina

My coach helped me see that energy has several layers. There is physical energy, which is affected by sleep, movement, food and health. There is emotional energy, which can be consumed by conflict, worry or constantly supporting other people. There is mental energy, which disappears when I am making too many decisions. Then there is the energy that comes from meaning, connection and enthusiasm.

This distinction matters because rest does not always solve the problem. I could sleep for eight hours and still feel mentally crowded after a week of switching between television work, writing, travel and family responsibilities. A quiet morning might restore my nervous system more effectively than an extra hour in bed. A meaningful conversation might give me more energy than an entire afternoon spent scrolling.

In Australia, work can involve significant travel between cities and time zones. A speaking engagement in Perth, followed by a meeting in Sydney, asks more of the body and mind than the event schedule may show. Even a domestic flight can require packing, airport transfers, preparation and social performance. I now count the invisible energy around an appointment, rather than judging it only by the length of the meeting.

Learning To Read My Personal Patterns

The most useful coaching exercise was tracking my energy without criticising it. For several weeks, I noticed when I felt alert, flat, focused, anxious or generous. I recorded what had happened beforehand. Patterns became visible very quickly. Some commitments looked attractive in my diary but left me scattered. Others required effort yet gave me a strong sense of purpose.

I also learned that my energy has a rhythm. I am better at thoughtful preparation earlier in the day, while creative ideas often arrive after I have stepped away from a problem. Important conversations deserve a clear space around them. If I schedule them immediately after a demanding broadcast or a long journey, I may be physically present without having enough attention available.

Writing has become one way to create that attention. Before a major event, I often use morning pages to empty out the noise in my head. The practice is simple: write freely, without trying to produce something polished. It helps me distinguish a genuine concern from a loose thought that has been taking up unnecessary room.

Clues That My Energy Needs Attention

• I become unusually impatient with small interruptions
• I keep rereading messages without absorbing them
• I say yes quickly and regret it later
• I lose interest in activities that normally nourish me

Boundaries Are An Energy Strategy

Before coaching, I thought boundaries were mostly about saying no. I now understand them as a way of making my yes more honest. A clear boundary protects the quality of my work, my relationships and my health. It also reduces the resentment that can grow when I agree to something while secretly wishing I had declined.

This is particularly relevant in public-facing work. A broadcaster or speaker can appear available because communication is part of the job. Messages arrive at different times, invitations overlap and last-minute changes are common. I have learned to ask what an opportunity requires from me before agreeing to it. Does it involve preparation? Travel? Emotional labour? A late finish before an early start? The answer affects the real cost.

The Australian market has its own practical pressures. Corporate events may involve early breakfasts in Melbourne, evening functions in Sydney or outdoor gatherings in Brisbane during hot weather. School holidays, long weekends and major sporting periods can change traffic, attendance and family logistics. Planning around those realities is not fussiness; it is sensible energy management.

I now build in transition time wherever possible. After hosting a large event, I do not assume I can move straight into a deep strategy meeting. After a run of media appearances, I may need a quiet afternoon rather than another social commitment. The empty space is productive because it helps me return with presence instead of simply turning up.

Recovery Has To Be Deliberate

I used to see recovery as the reward for finishing everything. Since everything is rarely finished, recovery was continually postponed. Coaching challenged that habit. Rest is not a sign that the work was too much or that I have failed to be resilient. It is part of sustaining performance over time.

Recovery can be active or quiet. A walk, stretching session or swim may help me release the physical effects of sitting, travelling and presenting. A technology-free coffee can give my mind a break from constant input. Time with people who know me well can restore an emotional sense of safety. The important point is to choose recovery that meets the type of fatigue I am experiencing.

This has become especially important during busy speaking seasons. A full day in transit, followed by a keynote and conversations with attendees, can be rewarding and draining at the same time. When I return home, I try to avoid filling the next morning with unnecessary commitments. I give myself space to sleep, move, reflect and reconnect with ordinary routines.

For many women, recovery can feel complicated by caring responsibilities and invisible household work. A free hour may be used to organise everyone else rather than restore ourselves. I have had to become more specific about what replenishment means for me and more willing to treat it as legitimate. A pause does not need to be dramatic to be valuable.

Purpose Helps Me Spend Energy Wisely

Energy management is not simply about doing less. It is about directing effort towards work and relationships that matter. My coaching conversations helped me identify the values beneath my professional life: courage, honesty, connection, growth and the desire to help women feel less alone in their experiences.

Those values give me a filter. Speaking about resilience and women’s wellbeing may require significant preparation, but it tends to leave me energised because the work feels meaningful. An obligation that looks easier on paper may be more draining if it asks me to perform a version of myself that no longer fits.

This is one reason I care so deeply about creating space for women to support one another. My work around being a fire starter is connected to the belief that encouragement can generate momentum. Supporting another woman does take energy, but it can also create energy when it is rooted in respect rather than rescue.

There is a difference between generous leadership and constant availability. I cannot solve every problem, answer every message or carry every person’s emotional load. I can use my voice thoughtfully, share what I have learned and help create environments where people are encouraged to take responsibility for their own growth.

Turning Awareness Into Daily Practice

The value of coaching has come from translating insight into small decisions. I review my week before it begins and look for clusters of high-demand commitments. I consider when I will prepare, travel, recover and deal with the ordinary tasks that keep life functioning. I do not always get it right, but I notice the consequences more quickly.

I also prepare differently for public work. Before a keynote, I limit unnecessary decisions and make sure I know what the audience needs from me. I protect a short period of quiet before going on stage. Afterwards, I allow time to come down from the intensity of presenting rather than pretending the event ends the moment I leave the platform.

Practices That Keep Me Steady

• Group demanding meetings instead of scattering them across every day
• Keep a short transition period before and after major events
• Choose movement, stillness or connection based on the kind of fatigue I feel
• Review commitments according to purpose, effort and recovery time

The approach is useful beyond a speaking career. Anyone managing a team, running a business, caring for family or building a new chapter can look at energy as a form of personal leadership. In fast-moving workplaces, including Australia’s busy corporate and media sectors, the person who appears most available is not always the person contributing most effectively.

I still have days when I overcommit or mistake adrenaline for capacity. The difference is that I now recognise those moments as information. My coach taught me to stop treating exhaustion as a character flaw and start treating it as feedback. That has made me more attentive, more purposeful and far more protective of the energy I need to do meaningful work.